Book Review: Don’t Tie Yourself Up in "Nots" by Dave Schloss, Part 2

Conclusion of a two-part book review and interview with Dave Schloss, author of Don’t Tie Yourself Up in "Nots"

(Click here to read part 1)

Does it seem as if there aren’t enough hours in the day to accomplish everything you want to do? Do you wish your life were different but you don’t know how to change it? In this second half of our book review and interview with motivational speaker Dave Schloss, you’ll find invaluable tips for setting goals and how to make the most of your time.

How do self-confidence and fear impact our efforts to change?
Everybody has fears, but most of our fears are self-imposed; we create them. Some people have a tendency to blow things out of proportion. They are afraid that if they take action it will bring a negative result. They start thinking of the problems they might face, and how hard it would be to overcome those problems. It seems monumental. It gets so far out of control that they stop themselves from doing what they really want to do with their lives.

Just remember the acronym for FEAR: False Evidence Appearing Real. That says it all, and it’s really what stops so many people. Some people even have a fear of success. As soon as they start doing well at something, they convince themselves that they don’t deserve success or that it’s not going to last. They should be telling themselves they deserve to be successful and that it’s going to continue because that builds a subconscious belief that it’s true. When you tell yourself that success can’t last, it usually doesn’t.

How can we set goals that win?
Goal setting is critical to success. First of all, goals have to be envisioned. It’s really not possible for you to move in a certain direction unless you can first see yourself going there or obtaining those goals. Secondly, you must have a passionate desire to achieve those goals. Making comments like "I think I’d like to do that" is just not good enough. You have to have a passionate desire or a drive to reach your goal. It has to be so strong that nothing can shake you from it. You must have a dynamic passion in order to go in that direction and achieve your goals. Thirdly, your goals must be well-defined and measurable. If you say, for example, "I want to be a better salesperson," that’s not well-defined and so it’s unmeasurable. But if you say, "I’m going to take these certain courses to become a better salesperson," checking them off as you complete them, that makes them well-defined and measurable.

Be flexible and make sure your goals are attainable. I believe we can achieve whatever we can believe, but a positive attitude isn’t everything. If, for example, I wanted to be the heavyweight champion of the world, and my weight is 170 pounds, I don’t care how positive-minded I am, I’m not going to be heavyweight champion. So for me, that’s not an attainable goal. But if there are things that I really believe in my heart I can do, that helps make the goal attainable.

To be truly effective, your goals have to be written down. That step dramatically increases your chances of attaining them. Of course, you then have to take action. Too many people have an "analysis paralysis" -- they go through almost all of the right steps but never get around to taking action. Writing down your goals and taking action is the key.

Think about this: If someone were to stop you at any given moment and ask you to name your No. 1 goal in life, could you do it? If you have to think about it, you don’t have a goal. Make sure your No. 1 goal is foremost in your mind, so no matter when someone asks you, you immediately know what it is.

How does time control factor into success?
If a magic genie were to grant us a wish for anything we wanted, not too many of us would ask for more time. Yet time is a precious commodity because we’re given a set amount. We all have 24 hours a day with which to accomplish our goals. What we don't know is how many of those days we will get, so it becomes critical to maximize our time.

The chapter on time management in my book is about finding a way to make sure you’re controlling time, rather than having it control you. Lots of people look back at their day and say, "I don’t know where all the time went." It’s amazing how much time we waste, but there are things you can do to maximize your time throughout the day and get more things accomplished. For example, keep a record of your activities for three months to help you recognize how you spend your time. And draw up a "must-do" list every day so you can get things accomplished.

If you want to get more time into your life, try leaving your TV off for a week. I’m not trying to say television is bad, but I think it’s probably true that if most people totaled the number of hours they sat in front of the TV over the course of a week, it would be a staggering amount. Another way to get more time into your life is to listen to self-improvement tapes while you’re in your car. You’re maximizing time that would have otherwise been wasted.

What’s the most important piece of advice for those who want a change?
The best thing you can do is decide what that change is going to be. The question that needs to be asked is "What would I try if I knew I could not fail?" Ask yourself that question, wait for the real answer, and then go after it with everything that you have. Be sure that you’re passionate. You can’t just have a passing interest in something and expect great success. You have to really be on fire for it. Focus on what you want. A magnifying glass does nothing if you wave it around, but it can burn through objects if you focus it. That’s the kind of focus you need to have to go after things you want to attain. And once you start, don’t quit. It sounds obvious, but it’s important. It seems so many people get incredibly close to success, but because they can't quite see it, they give up, usually right before it is about to pay off.

Anybody can stay motivated toward his or her goals for a couple months. Some people can stay motivated for a couple years. But a champion, a winner, can stay motivated for whatever time it takes to win, and it doesn’t matter how long that is. Don’t quit!

Don’t Tie Yourself Up in "Nots" by Dave Schloss is available at DaveSchloss.com. To read Dave's advice for investors, visit his investment advice, retirement investing and term life insurance advice pages.